Stowaway World Cup – Week 4

Well, what a week that was. If you cared, which you probably didn’t.

Throughout May, we’ve been playing the Stowaways World Cup, an entirely pointless contest in which we pitted 32 of the most-mentioned artists on this blog against one another, based on a mixture of randomness and their past credentials, with a very unhealthy dose of biased refereeing.

There were disappointments right from the start – Sparks could have easily progressed to the latter stages, but never managed to win a single game. The Beloved repeatedly lost their only player due to fouls (that was, in retrospect, a little unfair, so the rules were changed for later rounds). Even Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark failed to progress beyond the group stages due to performing slightly less well than Röyksopp.

The group of 16 saw surprises too, with two group winners and blog stalwarts being knocked out by group runners-up. By the last few matches, the finalists were increasingly closely matched. Erasure suffered a run of games ending with penalty shootouts, Pet Shop Boys, who had had a fairly clear run to the final, snuck an extra goal in at the end of extra time, and won the final, taking away the not-coveted Stowaway Cup. For the record, these were our final top four:

1. Pet Shop Boys
2. Erasure
3. Depeche Mode
4. New Order

Which is a pretty respectable result. We’ll take a short break on this blog now, but we’ll be back in a week or so with the regular schedule of posts.

Stowaway World Cup – Group of 16 – Games 5 & 6

Game 5: Pet Shop Boys versus Röyksopp

Our first game today pits the winner of Group E against the runner up of group F.

1. 6+4. Goal for worst performance in previous games. Röyksopp lost a game and drew one, so 0-1.
2. 4+1. Goal for most weeks on UK single chart. Equaliser – 1-1.
3. 2+4. An aggressive start to the game. Goal for quality of last album. Well that’s Hotspot and The Inevitable End. Both are good, but the latter is great. 1-2.
4. 6+2. Another shot! Goal for best album. Probably Behaviour, so 2-2.
5. 5+4. No goal.
6. 5+3. No goal.
7. 2+6. Goal for percentage of members who have remained. Both have always had two, so no goal.
8. 3+3. No goal.
9. 1+3. No goal.
10. 4+3. Late shot after a very quiet second half. Goal for most album releases. Pet Shop Boys score and win 3-2.

Game 6: Air versus I Monster

Next up, the winner of Group F against the runner up of group E.

1. 5+1. No goal.
2. 6+4. Goal for worst performance in previous games. That wildcard, which has turned up in nearly every game so far. Both won two and lost one in the group stages. Air won 2-0, were awarded a win after a dirty 0-0 draw, and lost 1-2. I Monster won 2-0, and 3-0 and lost 0-3. So this is close enough that the referee is ruling no goal.
3. 5+6. No goal.
4. 6+6. No goal.
5. 4+2. Goal for most single releases. Air score. 1-0.
6. 4+4. No goal.
7. 6+1. Goal for best song. Le Soleil est Près de Moi plays maybe Hey Mrs.? 2-0.
8. 1+3. No goal.
9. 6+1. Foul. 1+3. Penalty for I Monster, who score! 2-1.
10. 4+4. No goal. Air win 2-1.

Stowaway World Cup – Week 2

So, we reach the end of the group stages, in this entirely pointless competition. There were a few surprises. Group A saw Jean-Michel Jarre and Madonna and Yazoo advance. Group B was led by Kylie Minogue and Depeche Mode, while Sparks crashed out without a single win. Group C was led by Erasure and Massive Attack, and Group D by Kraftwerk and Goldfrapp. Group E saw The Beloved knocked out, with Pet Shop Boys and I Monster leading the pack. Group F was led by Air and Röyksopp, with OMD and Enigma knocked out. Group G was led by David Bowie and The Human League, and Group H by New Order and The Future Sound of London.

So those are the Group of 16, with some tricky games coming up this week, and at the end of this week we’ll also enter the all-unexciting quarter finals. So it’s a good time for some tweaks to the rules for the remainder of the competition.

Going forward:

1. You need an outright win – no more draws. We’ll have 4 throws of extra time, followed by penalties.
2. 6+6 is no longer a foul. Instead, a repeated throw is a foul, but only if it was going to be a goal attempt. If it’s a pair, we’ll ignore it, but if not, the foul was committed by the higher-scoring side (left = left team, right = right team). If the sum of the dice is even, it’s a scored penalty.
3. To reduce the number of goal chances, any double throws are no goal from now on.
4. Most of the goal-scoring categories will change to a new set of spurious deciders.

Stowaway World Cup – Group Stages – Games 37-40

Game 37: Pet Shop Boys versus I Monster

1. 5+6. No goal.
2. 2+4. Goal for quality of last album. Easy goal for Pet Shop Boys. 1-0.
3. 1+3. No goal.
4. 1+3. No goal.
5. 5+4. No goal.
6. 4+6. Goal for total weeks on UK album chart. 2-0.
7. 5+2. No goal.
8. 2+4. Re-roll. 2+4. Re-roll. 5+5. No goal.
9. 4+4. Goal for number of UK top ten hits. 3-0.
10. 2+4. Re-roll. 5+2. No goal. Pet Shop Boys win 3-0.

Game 38: Röyksopp versus Air

1. 2+2. Goal for number of studio albums to date. 0-1.
2. 4+2. Goal for most years between first and last hit. Röyksopp can claim 2001-2014, and Air just 1998-2004. 1-1.
3. 6+4. Goal for highest number of search engine results. Air cheat a bit by having such a common name, and I couldn’t really get the results down to a sensible number, so we’ll say no goal.
4. 3+3. No goal.
5. 4+3. Goal for highest number of remixes of another artist. Looks likely to be Röyksopp, so 2-1.
6. 2+6. Goal for number of permanent members. No goal.
7. 6+1. Goal for number of BRIT Award wins. No goal.
8. 3+3. No goal.
9. 1+6. No goal.
10. 5+2. No goal. Röyksopp sneak a 2-1 win over the leaders of their group.

Game 39: David Bowie versus Leftfield

1. 5+1. No goal.
2. 1+6. No goal.
3. 6+1. Goal for number of BRIT Award wins. 1-0.
4. 4+2. Goal for most years between first and last hit. 2-0.
5. 1+2. No goal.
6. 5+5. No goal.
7. 2+3. Goal for quality of first album. Easy goal for Leftfield. 2-1.
8. 6+1. Re-roll. 4+6. Goal for total weeks on UK album chart. 3-1.
9. 4+5. Goal for number of UK hit albums. 4-1.
10. 1+6. No goal. Bowie, undefeated in his group, wins 4-1.

Game 40: New Order versus The Radiophonic Workshop

1. 6+2. Goal for highest estimated total sales. 1-0.
2. 2+5. Goal for best artwork. New Order, for Music Complete and probably various others. 2-0.
3. 1+3. No goal.
4. 1+5. No goal.
5. 5+2. No goal.
6. 4+2. Goal for most years between first and last hit. 3-0.
7. 1+2. No goal.
8. 1+2. No goal.
9. 2+6. Goal for number of permanent members. Since The Radiophonic Workshop has been something of a revolving door, this is likely New Order, but it would be near-impossible to verify. Since it won’t make a difference to the result, we’ll rule this to be no goal.
10. 6+1. Goal for number of BRIT Award wins. New Order, with one. They win 4-0.

Stowaway World Cup – Week 1

So we reach the half way point of the group stages, and we’ve already had a lot of surprises. I’m sure you won’t have missed them in all the excitement, but just in case, here’s a recap.

Group A

The group is currently firmly led by Jean-Michel Jarre, with the Delerium / Front Line Assembly / Conjure One supergroup as runners-up, but any of the teams could still qualify.

Group B

Depeche Mode are well ahead, and after two disappointing losses for Sparks and a surprise win for Kylie Minogue, the latter currently looks likely to sneak into the group of sixteen.

Group C

Erasure have a strong lead, with Saint Etienne just holding onto second place, but with a game in hand.

Group D

Kraftwerk lead with two strong wins, and Hot Chip are currently holding onto second place after drawing against Goldfrapp in their first game.

Group E

Pet Shop Boys are leading, and after two dirty games from The Beloved, I Monster currently hold the runner-up spot.

Group F

Big surprises here. The favourites are currently right at the bottom of the table, with Enigma in first place, Air in second, and Röyksopp and OMD in third and fourth.

Group G

David Bowie is comfortably leading, with The Human League in second place.

Group H

New Order lead, with The Future Sound of London in second.

Stowaway World Cup – Group Stages – Games 21-24

Game 21: Pet Shop Boys versus The Beloved

1. 2+5. Goal for best artwork. Happiness is particularly good, but it’s not Mark Farrow. 1-0.
2. 5+3. No goal.
3. 4+2. Goal for most years between first and last hit. 2-0.
4. 3+1. No goal.
5. 6+6. That’s a foul. 2+5. Would be a penalty, but we’ve had that throw before, so one of the right-hand team is sent off. That’s Jon Marsh from The Beloved. As we mentioned last time he was sent off, he’s currently the only member, so the game is a win for Pet Shop Boys. 2-0.

Game 22: Röyksopp versus Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark

1. 3+6. No goal.
2. 2+1. Goal for most charismatic performer(s). Interesting call. Slight goal for OMD. 0-1.
3. 5+2. No goal.
4. 1+3. No goal.
5. 6+2. Goal for highest estimated total sales. 0-2.
6. 2+3. Goal for quality of first album. That would probably be Melody AM, by a slight margin. 1-2.
7. 6+3. Goal for highest number of mentions on blog. 2-2.
8. 3+5. No goal.
9. 1+4. No goal.
10. 3+6. No goal. That’s a 2-2 draw.

Game 23: David Bowie versus The Human League

1. 4+4. Goal for number of UK top ten hits. Easy goal for Bowie. 1-0.
2. 6+1. Goal for number of BRIT Award wins. Also Bowie. 2-0.
3. 3+1. No goal.
4. 1+5. No goal.
5. 6+5. Goal for funniest band picture. Has to just be Bowie. 3-0.
6. 1+5. No goal.
7. 5+1. No goal.
8. 4+3. Goal for highest number of remixes of another artist. I’m going to say no goal. 3-0.
9. 4+1. Goal for highest debut position on UK singles chart. That’s Bowie again. 4-0.
10. 2+2. Goal for number of studio albums to date. Huge, easy win for Bowie. 5-0.

Game 24: New Order versus The Future Sound of London

1. 2+6. Goal for number of permanent members. New Order have held on to two, while FSOL have only ever had two. No goal.
2. 1+5. No goal.
3. 6+4. Goal for highest number of search engine results. New Order score. 1-0.
4. 2+6. Re-roll. 5+3. No goal.
5. 5+3. No goal.
6. 6+1. Goal for number of BRIT Award wins. New Order have just one. 2-0.
7. 6+2. Goal for highest estimated total sales. 3-0.
8. 1+4. No goal.
9. 1+6. No goal.
10. 2+3. Goal for quality of first album. Slight goal, but much too late in the game, for The Future Sound of London. 3-1.

Stowaway World Cup – Group Stages – Games 5-8

Game 5: Pet Shop Boys versus Client

1. 3+1. No goal.
2. 5+4. No goal.
3. 6+3. Goal for highest number of mentions on blog. Clear goal for Pet Shop Boys. 1-0.
4. 3+3. No goal.
5. 3+2. No goal.
6. 5+4. No goal.
7. 4+6. Goal for total weeks on UK album chart. 2-0.
8. 4+2. Goal for years between first and last hit. 3-0.
9. 6+2. Goal for estimated total sales. 4-0.
10. 1+2. No goal, but an easy win for Pet Shop Boys.

Game 6: Röyksopp versus Enigma

1. 6+1. Goal for number of BRIT Award wins. Neither has any, so no goal.
2. 6+1. Goal for number of BRIT Award wins. Since we’ve had this twice, let’s say that since Röyksopp were nominated and Enigma weren’t, we’ll tweak the rules and call this 1-0.
3. 4+2. Goal for years between first and last hit. Röyksopp had their first in late 2001, and their last in 2014, so 13 years. Enigma can claim 1990 to 2000, so just 11. 2-0.
4. 6+5. Goal for funniest band picture. Tricky – Michael Cretu from Enigma had some pretty tragic hair in the 1980s, whereas all of Röyksopp‘s silly pictures seem to be intentional. 2-1.
5. 2+3. Goal for quality of first album. That would be Melody AM versus MCMXC a.d. Very tough. Let’s give it to Enigma, so 2-2.
6. 2+2. Goal for number of studio albums to date. Tight goal for Enigma. 2-3.
7. 2+4. Goal for quality of last album. Enigma have been in decline recently, so that’s an equaliser for Röyksopp. 3-3.
8. 6+1. Third time, so let’s throw again. 6+6. Foul! 2+2. Goal for number of studio albums to date, which we’ve also had before. 4-6. Goal for total weeks on UK album chart. Very close, but another tight goal for Enigma. 2-4.
9. 6+6. Another foul. This is getting silly, so I’m blowing the whistle on this game. 2-4 to Enigma.

Game 7: David Bowie versus Ladytron

1. 2+3. Goal for quality of first album. I’m sure some people like Bowie’s first album, but probably not many. Early goal for Ladytron. 0-1.
2. 1+4. No goal.
3. 5+1. No goal.
4. 3+5. No goal.
5. 5+2. No goal.
6. 5+6. No goal.
7. 4+1. Goal for debut position on UK singles chart. Space Oddity entered at number 48 in September 1969, while Ladytron have barely ever had a hit that big. Equaliser for Bowie. 1-1.
8. 4+3. Goal for number of UK #1s. Easy goal for David Bowie. 2-1.
9. 4+4. Goal for number of UK top ten hits. 3-1.
10. 2+5. Goal for best artwork. They’ve both had some hits and misses. Let’s call that a missed goal. Bowie wins 3-1, and since we had so many chart-related goals this time, I’m going to remove one from the future list.

Game 8: New Order versus William Orbit

1. 5+4. No goal.
2. 3+6. No goal.
3. 4+4. Goal for number of UK top ten hits. Easy goal for New Order. 1-0.
4. 5+5. No goal.
5. 3+5. No goal.
6. 1+2. No goal.
7. 6+6. Foul. 1+5. William Orbit is sent off, and now has no players left, so the game is over. 1-0.

Stowaway World Cup – Start of Play

So, as of yesterday’s post, we know how the groups are looking. The upcoming week will see four games per day, so in a week’s time we should be starting to have a feel for how the results are starting to shape up.

As a reminder, we’re about to start the group stages, with eight groups:

• Group A, with Jean-Michel Jarre as favourite, but any of the other three could qualify
• Group B, a competitive group containing Depeche Mode, Sparks, and Kylie Minogue
• Group C, another competitive group with Erasure, Saint Etienne, and Massive Attack
• Group D, with Goldfrapp, Kraftwerk, and Hot Chip
• Group E, with Pet Shop Boys and three other strong contenders
• Group F, with Röyksopp, OMD, Air, and Enigma
• Group G, with David Bowie and The Human League
• Group H, with New Order and three other strong teams

The excitement begins (and potentially also ends) tomorrow. Stay tuned!

Stowaway World Cup – The Draw

OK, time for the all-important draw. Pot A consists of the top 8 artists by mentions on this blog:

• Pet Shop Boys
• Depeche Mode
• Jean-Michel Jarre
• Röyksopp
• Erasure
• New Order
• David Bowie
• Goldfrapp

Pot B consists of the next eight, except that Moby is busy getting vegan tattoos, so won’t be taking part this year. Delerium, Front Line Assembly, and Conjure One are pretty much the same people anyway, so they have formed a single team together.

• Saint Etienne
• Kraftwerk
• Sparks
• Delerium / Front Line Assembly / Conjure One
• The Human League
• Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark
• The Future Sound of London
• The Beloved

Pot C sees a few disqualifications, with Vince Clarke taking part as part of Erasure, and Martin L. Gore playing for Depeche Mode:

• Air
• Little Boots
• Massive Attack
• Kylie Minogue
• I Monster
• William Orbit
• Ladytron
• Hot Chip

Finally, Pot D sees Dave Gahan disqualified for being part of Depeche Mode, plus U2 and Coldplay disqualified for not being very good. Yazoo formed a team with Madonna, for no particularly good reason.

• Madonna and Yazoo
• The Radiophonic Workshop
• Leftfield
• Everything But The Girl
• Shit Robot
• Client
• Enigma
• Bent

After the draw, the eight groups look like this:

• Group A: Jean-Michel Jarre, Delerium / Front Line Assembly / Conjure One, Little Boots, Madonna and Yazoo
• Group B: Depeche Mode, Sparks, Kylie Minogue, Everything But The Girl
• Group C: Erasure, Saint Etienne, Massive Attack, Shit Robot
• Group D: Goldfrapp, Kraftwerk, Hot Chip, Bent
• Group E: Pet Shop Boys, The Beloved, I Monster, Client
• Group F: Röyksopp, Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark, Air, Enigma
• Group G: David Bowie, The Human League, Ladytron, Leftfield
• Group H: New Order, The Future Sound of London, William Orbit, The Radiophonic Workshop

So the first game will be Jean-Michel Jarre versus Madonna and Yazoo, in a couple of days’ time.

Chart for stowaways – January 2021

This may change soon, but the charts were a little slow during 2020, probably due to the seemingly never-ending lockdowns. Since January is always slow, so it was at the start of this year, but the albums are still a little different to how they looked the last time you saw them:

1. The Future Sound of London – Cascade 2020
2. Sarah Nixey – Night Walks
3. Front Line Assembly – WarMech
4. Pet Shop Boys – Hotspot
5. Jean Michel Jarre – Welcome to the Other Side
6. Camouflage – Relocated
7. Goldfrapp – Black Cherry
8. Air – Pocket Symphony
9. Honeyroot – Sound Echo Location
10. Röyksopp – Melody am