Stowaway World Cup – Week 4

Well, what a week that was. If you cared, which you probably didn’t.

Throughout May, we’ve been playing the Stowaways World Cup, an entirely pointless contest in which we pitted 32 of the most-mentioned artists on this blog against one another, based on a mixture of randomness and their past credentials, with a very unhealthy dose of biased refereeing.

There were disappointments right from the start – Sparks could have easily progressed to the latter stages, but never managed to win a single game. The Beloved repeatedly lost their only player due to fouls (that was, in retrospect, a little unfair, so the rules were changed for later rounds). Even Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark failed to progress beyond the group stages due to performing slightly less well than Röyksopp.

The group of 16 saw surprises too, with two group winners and blog stalwarts being knocked out by group runners-up. By the last few matches, the finalists were increasingly closely matched. Erasure suffered a run of games ending with penalty shootouts, Pet Shop Boys, who had had a fairly clear run to the final, snuck an extra goal in at the end of extra time, and won the final, taking away the not-coveted Stowaway Cup. For the record, these were our final top four:

1. Pet Shop Boys
2. Erasure
3. Depeche Mode
4. New Order

Which is a pretty respectable result. We’ll take a short break on this blog now, but we’ll be back in a week or so with the regular schedule of posts.

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Stowaway World Cup – Week 2

So, we reach the end of the group stages, in this entirely pointless competition. There were a few surprises. Group A saw Jean-Michel Jarre and Madonna and Yazoo advance. Group B was led by Kylie Minogue and Depeche Mode, while Sparks crashed out without a single win. Group C was led by Erasure and Massive Attack, and Group D by Kraftwerk and Goldfrapp. Group E saw The Beloved knocked out, with Pet Shop Boys and I Monster leading the pack. Group F was led by Air and Röyksopp, with OMD and Enigma knocked out. Group G was led by David Bowie and The Human League, and Group H by New Order and The Future Sound of London.

So those are the Group of 16, with some tricky games coming up this week, and at the end of this week we’ll also enter the all-unexciting quarter finals. So it’s a good time for some tweaks to the rules for the remainder of the competition.

Going forward:

1. You need an outright win – no more draws. We’ll have 4 throws of extra time, followed by penalties.
2. 6+6 is no longer a foul. Instead, a repeated throw is a foul, but only if it was going to be a goal attempt. If it’s a pair, we’ll ignore it, but if not, the foul was committed by the higher-scoring side (left = left team, right = right team). If the sum of the dice is even, it’s a scored penalty.
3. To reduce the number of goal chances, any double throws are no goal from now on.
4. Most of the goal-scoring categories will change to a new set of spurious deciders.

Stowaway World Cup – Group Stages – Games 41-44

Game 41: Delerium / Front Line Assembly / Conjure One versus Madonna and Yazoo

1. 6+5. Goal for funniest band picture. 0-1.
2. 5+5. No goal.
3. 1+1. No goal.
4. 6+4. Goal for highest number of search engine results. 0-2.
5. 3+3. No goal.
6. 2+3. Goal for quality of first album. Easy goal for Yazoo. 0-3.
7. 2+1. Goal for most charismatic performer(s). Madonna. 0-4.
8. 6+4. Re-roll. 3+4. No goal.
9. 1+5. No goal.
10. 3+6. No goal. The odd pairing of Madonna and Yazoo win 0-4.

Game 42: Sparks versus Everything But The Girl

1. 3+2. No goal.
2. 3+5. No goal.
3. 4+5. Goal for number of UK hit albums. Everything But The Girl take an early lead. 0-1.
4. 3+2. No goal.
5. 5+1. No goal.
6. 1+6. No goal.
7. 1+4. No goal.
8. 4+5. Re-roll. 5+2. No goal.
9. 2+5. Goal for best artwork. Could go either way, but Walking Wounded and Temperamental are particularly great. 0-2.
10. 5+5. No goal, and a shocker! Everything But The Girl win 0-2, sadly pushing Sparks to the bottom of this tough group.

Game 43: Saint Etienne versus Massive Attack

1. 6+2. Goal for highest estimated total sales. Difficult to know for sure, so no goal.
2. 2+6. Goal for number of permanent members. Saint Etienne score. 1-0.
3. 1+3. No goal.
4. 1+3. No goal.
5. 6+4. Goal for highest number of search engine results. 1-1.
6. 2+6. Re-roll. 6+3. Goal for highest number of mentions on blog. 2-1.
7. 3+5. No goal.
8. 1+1. No goal.
9. 4+2. Goal for most years between first and last hit. Very close, but Massive Attack just have it. 2-2.
10. 5+2. No goal. Draw! 2-2.

Game 44: Kraftwerk versus Hot Chip

1. 6+3. Goal for highest number of mentions on blog. 1-0.
2. 2+2. Goal for number of studio albums to date. 2-0.
3. 5+5. No goal.
4. 3+1. No goal.
5. 4+5. Goal for number of UK hit albums. 3-0.
6. 2+1. Goal for most charismatic performer(s). 3-1.
7. 5+5. No goal.
8. 2+5. Goal for best artwork. 4-1.
9. 6+6. Foul. 2+4. One of Hot Chip gets sent off.
10. 1+5. No goal. Kraftwerk win 4-1.

Stowaway World Cup – Week 1

So we reach the half way point of the group stages, and we’ve already had a lot of surprises. I’m sure you won’t have missed them in all the excitement, but just in case, here’s a recap.

Group A

The group is currently firmly led by Jean-Michel Jarre, with the Delerium / Front Line Assembly / Conjure One supergroup as runners-up, but any of the teams could still qualify.

Group B

Depeche Mode are well ahead, and after two disappointing losses for Sparks and a surprise win for Kylie Minogue, the latter currently looks likely to sneak into the group of sixteen.

Group C

Erasure have a strong lead, with Saint Etienne just holding onto second place, but with a game in hand.

Group D

Kraftwerk lead with two strong wins, and Hot Chip are currently holding onto second place after drawing against Goldfrapp in their first game.

Group E

Pet Shop Boys are leading, and after two dirty games from The Beloved, I Monster currently hold the runner-up spot.

Group F

Big surprises here. The favourites are currently right at the bottom of the table, with Enigma in first place, Air in second, and Röyksopp and OMD in third and fourth.

Group G

David Bowie is comfortably leading, with The Human League in second place.

Group H

New Order lead, with The Future Sound of London in second.

Stowaway World Cup – Group Stages – Games 17-20

Game 17: Jean-Michel Jarre versus Delerium / Front Line Assembly / Conjure One

1. 1+2. No goal.
2. 4+5. Goal for number of UK hit albums. Easy goal for Jarre. 1-0.
3. 5+3. No goal.
4. 3+2. No goal.
5. 4+6. Goal for total weeks on UK album chart. Jarre again. 2-0.
6. 4+1. Goal for highest debut position on UK singles chart. Surprising goal for Delerium, who peaked at number 3 with Silence. 2-1.
7. 5+3. No goal.
8. 3+6. No goal.
9. 3+2. No goal.
10. 5+2. No goal. Win for Jean-Michel Jarre, 2-1.

Game 18: Depeche Mode versus Sparks

1. 1+5. No goal.
2. 4+5. Goal for number of UK hit albums. Sparks have a lot more albums, but a big gap in their chart history. 1-0.
3. 5+4. No goal.
4. 5+4. No goal.
5. 3+5. No goal.
6. 4+1. Goal for highest debut position on UK singles chart. Wow, Sparks equalise, having started their career at number 48. 1-1.
7. 3+6. No goal.
8. 4+6. Goal for total weeks on UK album chart. 2-1.
9. 6+2. Goal for highest estimated total sales. Has to be the Mode. 3-1.
10. 2+5. Goal for best artwork. Tricky, as both have some epic wins and some epic fails. I’ll award it to Depeche Mode, for Violator. 4-1.

Game 19: Erasure versus Saint Etienne

1. 1+6. No goal.
2. 3+2. No goal.
3. 4+4. Goal for number of UK top ten hits. Goal for Erasure. 1-0.
4. 6+2. Goal for highest estimated total sales. Goal for Erasure. 2-0.
5. 6+3. Goal for highest number of mentions on blog. Another for Erasure. 3-0.
6. 6+2. We’ve had that before, so let’s throw again. 3+2. No goal.
7. 3+6. No goal.
8. 6+5. Goal for funniest band picture. Another goal for Erasure. 4-0.
9. 3+4. No goal.
10. 4+5. Goal for number of UK hit albums. An outstanding win for Erasure. 5-0.

Game 20: Goldfrapp versus Kraftwerk

1. 2+4. Goal for quality of last album. Kraftwerk‘s last wasn’t a fan favourite, but I think it was easily better than Goldfrapp‘s. 0-1.
2. 6+1. Goal for number of BRIT Award wins. Goldfrapp were nominated once, but no goal.
3. 6+4. Goal for highest number of search engine results. Easy goal for Kraftwerk. 0-2.
4. 4+4. Goal for number of UK top ten hits. Goldfrapp have three. 1-2.
5. 1+2. No goal.
6. 2+4. We’ve had before, so re-roll. 2+4. Same. 3+1. No goal.
7. 3+2. No goal.
8. 5+3. No goal.
9. 1+3. No goal.
10. 1+1. No goal. Kraftwerk win 1-2.

Stowaway World Cup – Group Stages – Games 9-12

Game 9: Delerium / Front Line Assembly / Conjure One versus Little Boots

1. 4+1. Goal for debut position on UK singles chart. Little Boots only entered at 97, so Delerium et al score. 1-0.
2. 6+4. Goal for highest number of search engine results. I tried them all, and got the most for Little Boots. 1-1.
3. 1+5. No goal.
4. 2+6. Goal for number of permanent members. Probably a goal for Delerium and friends. 2-1.
5. 5+2. No goal.
6. 2+1. Goal for most charismatic performer(s). Easy goal for Little Boots. 2-2.
7. 3+6. No goal.
8. 2+1. Goal for most charismatic performer(s). She’s so much more charismatic that she deserves another. Goal for Little Boots. 2-3.
9. 2+2. Goal for number of studio albums to date. Easy goal for Delerium and gang. 3-3.
10. 4+6. Goal for total weeks on UK album chart. Delerium win the category and match with a single song. 4-3.

Game 10: Sparks versus Kylie Minogue

1. 4+3. Goal for highest number of remixes of another artist. Sparks only have a couple, but that’s enough to put them ahead. 1-0.
2. 3+3. No goal.
3. 4+6. Goal for total weeks on UK album chart. Easy goal for Kylie. 1-1.
4. 5+2. No goal.
5. 1+2. No goal.
6. 3+1. No goal.
7. 6+1. Goal for number of BRIT Award wins. Easy goal for Kylie. 1-2.
8. 1+4. No goal.
9. 3+3. No goal.
10. 1+3. No goal. Tough game for Sparks there, losing 1-2.

Game 11: Saint Etienne versus Shit Robot

1. 3+1. No goal.
2. 5+1. No goal.
3. 5+4. No goal.
4. 3+6. No goal.
5. 4+1. Goal for highest debut position on UK singles chart. Well, Shit Robot have/has no hits, so 1-0.
6. 1+2. No goal.
7. 1+3. No goal.
8. 4+4. Goal for number of UK top ten hits. Same. 2-0.
9. 6+5. Goal for funniest band picture. Late goal for Shit Robot. 2-1.
10. 4+4. Referee’s decision is to be nice to the underdog and throw again. 6+2. Goal for highest estimated total sales. Another goal for Saint Etienne. 3-1.

Game 12: Kraftwerk versus Bent

1. 5+5. No goal.
2. 3+3. No goal.
3. 5+1. No goal.
4. 5+2. No goal.
5. 4+3. Goal for highest number of remixes of another artist. Another slow game to get started, and an easy opening goal for Bent. 0-1.
6. 2+1. Goal for most charismatic performer(s). Very tricky. Kraftwerk are hardly charismatic, but they have a certain Teutonic charm. 1-1.
7. 5+6. No goal.
8. 4+6. Goal for total weeks on UK album chart. Easy goal for Kraftwerk. 2-1.
9. 1+2. No goal.
10. 2+5. Goal for best artwork. Has to be Kraftwerk, even if they have been busy George Lucassing them in recent years. 3-1.

Stowaway World Cup – Start of Play

So, as of yesterday’s post, we know how the groups are looking. The upcoming week will see four games per day, so in a week’s time we should be starting to have a feel for how the results are starting to shape up.

As a reminder, we’re about to start the group stages, with eight groups:

• Group A, with Jean-Michel Jarre as favourite, but any of the other three could qualify
• Group B, a competitive group containing Depeche Mode, Sparks, and Kylie Minogue
• Group C, another competitive group with Erasure, Saint Etienne, and Massive Attack
• Group D, with Goldfrapp, Kraftwerk, and Hot Chip
• Group E, with Pet Shop Boys and three other strong contenders
• Group F, with Röyksopp, OMD, Air, and Enigma
• Group G, with David Bowie and The Human League
• Group H, with New Order and three other strong teams

The excitement begins (and potentially also ends) tomorrow. Stay tuned!

Stowaway World Cup – The Draw

OK, time for the all-important draw. Pot A consists of the top 8 artists by mentions on this blog:

• Pet Shop Boys
• Depeche Mode
• Jean-Michel Jarre
• Röyksopp
• Erasure
• New Order
• David Bowie
• Goldfrapp

Pot B consists of the next eight, except that Moby is busy getting vegan tattoos, so won’t be taking part this year. Delerium, Front Line Assembly, and Conjure One are pretty much the same people anyway, so they have formed a single team together.

• Saint Etienne
• Kraftwerk
• Sparks
• Delerium / Front Line Assembly / Conjure One
• The Human League
• Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark
• The Future Sound of London
• The Beloved

Pot C sees a few disqualifications, with Vince Clarke taking part as part of Erasure, and Martin L. Gore playing for Depeche Mode:

• Air
• Little Boots
• Massive Attack
• Kylie Minogue
• I Monster
• William Orbit
• Ladytron
• Hot Chip

Finally, Pot D sees Dave Gahan disqualified for being part of Depeche Mode, plus U2 and Coldplay disqualified for not being very good. Yazoo formed a team with Madonna, for no particularly good reason.

• Madonna and Yazoo
• The Radiophonic Workshop
• Leftfield
• Everything But The Girl
• Shit Robot
• Client
• Enigma
• Bent

After the draw, the eight groups look like this:

• Group A: Jean-Michel Jarre, Delerium / Front Line Assembly / Conjure One, Little Boots, Madonna and Yazoo
• Group B: Depeche Mode, Sparks, Kylie Minogue, Everything But The Girl
• Group C: Erasure, Saint Etienne, Massive Attack, Shit Robot
• Group D: Goldfrapp, Kraftwerk, Hot Chip, Bent
• Group E: Pet Shop Boys, The Beloved, I Monster, Client
• Group F: Röyksopp, Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark, Air, Enigma
• Group G: David Bowie, The Human League, Ladytron, Leftfield
• Group H: New Order, The Future Sound of London, William Orbit, The Radiophonic Workshop

So the first game will be Jean-Michel Jarre versus Madonna and Yazoo, in a couple of days’ time.

Greatest Hits 2021

It’s with sincere regret that I realize that I didn’t actually manage to bring you a single new review in 2020, thanks to personal commitments and the ongoing lockdown. For the time being, while I’m unable to bring you more, here are ten of the greatest hits from the history of this blog:

1. Garbage – Cherry Lips (Go Baby Go)
2. Jean-Michel Jarre – Chronologie
3. Kraftwerk – Aerodynamik
4. Moby – Ambient
5. Olive – Extra Virgin
6. Rex the Dog – The Rex the Dog Show
7. Sparks – In Outer Space
8. Sébastien Tellier – Politics
9. Way Out West – We Love Machine
10. The xx – xx

Chart for stowaways – Albums 2020

Here are the top albums for last year:

1. Pet Shop Boys – Hotspot
2. The Beloved – Where it Is
3. The Future Sound of London – Cascade 2020
4. Sparks – Past Tense – The Best Of (climbing from number 5 in 2019)
5. The Beloved – Happiness
6. Sparks – Gratuitous Sax & Senseless Violins (climbing from number 7 in 2019)
7. Sparks – A Steady Drip, Drip, Drip
8. Erasure – The Neon
9. Caribou – Suddenly
10. Sarah Nixey – Night Walks
11. Depeche Mode – Spirits In The Forest
12. Kraftwerk – 3-D Der Katalog (number 5 in 2017)
13. Hot Chip – A Bath Full Of Ecstasy (falling from number 1 in 2019)
14. Front Line Assembly – WarMech
15. The Human League – The Essential
16. Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds – Ghosteen (falling from number 12 in 2019)
17. Joy Division – Closer
18. Pet Shop Boys – PopArt
19. The Orb – Abolition Of The Royal Familia
20. David Bowie – I’m Only Dancing (The Soul Tour ’74)